uberreiniger: (Perverts)
[personal profile] uberreiniger
...When both members of the couple doing so mutter something about each forgetting their wallets and abruptly leave. It's worth mentioning that the bottles of KY were $2.84 but they had a $3.00 coupon to go with each one. Yes, they were effectively trying to get paid for buying more lube than two people can reasonably be expected to use. Seriously, TEN bottles? Unless you're hosting an orgy or are Audrey Hollander's* personal shopper, I can't see how you could ever need that much all in one go even if you do happen to somehow wind up with ten coupons for it.

And why the copy of The Hunger Games? That's what really made it stand out for me. For all we know they were trying to reinvigorate a stagnate marriage; her by confronting her personal dryness issue, him by fantasizing about Katniss. Perhaps they were assigned to do research for the inevitable spoof porn movie, no doubt to be entitled either The Hung Games or The Humper Games.

Also included in this uncompleted transaction were a box of fruit roll-ups and a package of Angry Birds band-aids. What would MacGuyver do?

*Google her if you're curious. Just don't be at work when you do.

Date: 2012-03-24 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rosehiptea.livejournal.com
This post cracked me up.

Also, The Hunger Games would make an amazing spoof porn. I'm surprised it isn't already out there. Which maybe it is, but there are some things I just don't want to Google.

(Audrey Hollander isn't one of them. Though I wound up with her surprisingly work safe Wikipedia article, which includes the fact that she won the 2008 AVN Award for Most Outrageous Sex Scene. I'm betting that was pretty damn outrageous.)

Date: 2012-03-24 04:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] batchix.livejournal.com
Dave said, "THAT'S AMAZING!"

Also, this is for you: http://batchix.tumblr.com/post/19800845091

Date: 2012-03-24 04:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bedlaminzenity.livejournal.com
As of December 2009, she has appeared in over 294 productions and is credited as co-director for the "Otto and Audrey Destroy the World" series of films.

impressive. as to the why 10 bottles of lube - i'd say see that 2008 avn.

i think you nailed the explanation perfectly!

Date: 2012-03-24 08:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] flame-song.livejournal.com
Errr...ummmm....WTF? *lol*

Date: 2012-03-25 04:02 pm (UTC)
styxx374: (Default)
From: [personal profile] styxx374
Thank God my coffee was too hot to be drinking, or I would have snarfed coffee all over my screen when I read this post....

Date: 2012-03-26 02:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forensicgirl.livejournal.com
That's a lot of lube-reminds me of when I worked at the local porn shack for 4 months.

Date: 2012-03-31 12:47 pm (UTC)
mokie: Earthrise seen from the moon (Default)
From: [personal profile] mokie
I once had to call a manager to go discourage customers from taste testing flavored lubes.

But only because I'd been specifically asked not to make interesting over-the-com announcements anymore.

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