Writer's Block: God For a Day

[uberreiniger]

[Error: unknown template qotd] You don't want me to be God, not even for a day. For I would be a very vengeful sort of God and I'm honest enough to admit it. Burning pitch would rain from the skies onto the palaces of the mighty and the cruel; and rapists, child molestors, drug dealers, and war criminals would be cast from the rooftops and torn apart in the street by wild dogs in all the agony that fans of the Old Testament have come to expect.

Realizing this, I would probably assume the likeness of Morgan Freeman, give all my powers to a spastic, middle aged white comedian, and take the rest of the day off.

Comments

[dungeonwriter.livejournal.com]

Snicker, well, you'd definitely make an Awesome God.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Thanks but I think at the end of the day I'd just be yet another human making a mess that the real God would wind up getting blamed for.

[fadedsecret.livejournal.com]

But you would be praised by millions of people during sex!!!!

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Well, since I do believe that the world can be healed by more people having orgasms more regularly I would at least have to try to see what that could accomplish with divine power backing it up :)

[rainecloud.livejournal.com]

I agree with 85% percent of this.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

I'm doing good then. Being God typically seems to mean people agreeing with 85% of what you say and ignoring the rest.

[fadedsecret.livejournal.com]

I healed the world 4 times in one session then, just last night.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Praise God(s)!

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

See? If everyone could do that there'd be no time for war.

[nightshade-7976.livejournal.com]

LOL! :)

[l-greytree.livejournal.com]

Agreed! More sex and more orgasms!

[l-greytree.livejournal.com]

I think you'd do a much better job than the ones we have now.

Here's what I would do:
1. Eliminate all fanatic thoughts and impulses from religious extremists.
2. Transform all aggressive, criminal, and warlike thoughts into a desire to study zen, cooking, ikebana, or music.
3. Increase my pay rate for when I stop being God and have to go back to my day job.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Well, I wrote Apocalypse Woman and am working on its sequels so hopefully I've done my part :)

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Good thinking on the pay rate :)

[megiloth.livejournal.com]

Our Tyree is an awwwwwesome Tyreeeeee...

[megiloth.livejournal.com]

hehe, whenever I see the Andes Jesus stature, I just want to caption it: "I swear! It was THIS big!" You know how those fishermen from Galilee are. Always telling stories aboot the one that got away :)

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

It makes me think of Sepultura because the first place I ever saw it was one of their videos :)

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

That extra syllable kind of screws it up, doesn't it?

[megiloth.livejournal.com]

Our George is a gaaaasssy George...