Writer's Block: Rotten tomatoes

[uberreiniger]

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If it had been made, Highlander II would be the worst movie I had ever seen. But it was never made. There was no Highlander II. It does not exist. If it had existed they probably would have retconned the Immortals to be aliens but they didn't because it was never filmed.

So I will go with a movie that actually does exist: Citizen Kane. I'll let Peter Griffin's thoughts speak for me on the matter: It was a sled. Rosebud was his sled he had as a child. There, I just saved you two boring boobless hours!

Comments

[donkeyjon.livejournal.com]

Pink Flamingos certainly doesn't exist, and if it did, it absolutely would not feature an enormous tranny eating dog poo.

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

Hehehe. Aw... but it *does* exist! And it's TERRIBLE!!

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Nope! Nope! No such thing! And it doesn't postulate that we will drive old cars because the world is ending and it definitely doesn't have Jeremy Irons ripping peoples' jaws off!

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

But wouldn't it be so awesome if it did? I mean, how you you not love Jeremy Irons ripping someone's jaw off?

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but that's silly. I mean, if Jeremy Irons started doing movies where he ripped people's jaws off, then the next thing you know he'd be reduced to acting in some terrible Dungeons and Dragons ripoff.

I do wish they'd made more of the Matrix, though... that world seemed interesting.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Not only did I like all the Star Wars prequels, but I also liked the Matrix sequels. Although I did think the third one lost sight of Neo as the central character.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

I saw Ron Jeremy doing something once that looked like it was dislocating the girl's jaw. Does that count for anything?

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

Well... same hair colour... but Ron Jeremy looks like Super Mario.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

(http://s783.photobucket.com/albums/yy112/ubereiniger_2009/?action=view&current=supermariojeremy.jpg)

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

(http://s783.photobucket.com/albums/yy112/ubereiniger_2009/?action=view&current=two-girls-1-up.jpg)

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! Well played, sir.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

Classic! You win, stunning me with your Super Pornio powers.

[tempested-bird.livejournal.com]

VICTORY IS MINE!!

[shadowfell.livejournal.com]

I sure have a lot of awful memories from a movie that doesn't exist...

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

If it did exist it would very likely involve goths wearing jet packs but it DOESN'T EXIST!

[chriswatkins.livejournal.com]

To this day I can't imagine what anyone involved with Highlander 2 was thinking. It's the first time I recall seeing a movie audience so disappointed with a sequel that they started heckling the screen... and nobody complained. There were jeers. Then there was giggling. Then there was laughter.

If it were ever made. Which it wasn't.

Citizen Kane... I think it's interesting from a historical point of view. It's full of filming techniques that were innovative for the 40s. Which I can appreciate, but I don't have the urge to watch it again.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

I can't remember where, but there was an interview with Christopher Lambert many years ago in which he was asked what he was thinking with Highlander 2 (and 3, for that matter.) His response? "I was under contract."

[lizzie_borden]

Hi, I followed you over from tempested_bird's journal because I was randomly clicking icons and yours caught my eye- it's rare to find WoW fans that're coherent and able to spell or care about world events and you seem to like some of the things I do, Luis Royo, WoW, Futurama, and cheeky art, so, I thought I'd add you. (I was also really surprised to see that you were listening to Blind Guardian, and I think that'll instantly put you in my husband's good graces, because I can't think of another human being I've ever come across on the planet aside from him that knows who they are.) Nice to meet you and all.

[uberreiniger.livejournal.com]

It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I will add you as well! And yes, Blind Guardian is one of my favorite bands. Hang around here you'll meet a couple of other people who enjoy them as well.